Musical Noise

Life is full of oxymorons. 
In the long run we are all dead, so says Keynes.  
In the real world, the fight for permanent change results in quiet revolutions, civil wars.
Yet young adults carry on their working lunches, walking around Wall Street like the living dead. 
As if in virtual reality. 

Emotional epiphany is but a beautiful disaster. 
And become a broken whole, silently applauding the rollercoaster of our lives.

Good grief! 

Don't live your life vicariously through someone else's adventures. 
It's not the same difference as a perfectly normal existence. 

Friends share happy problems and tearful laughters. 
Where are ours? 

This poem is a tribute to this blog. It may turn into lyrics in the future should it be set to music one day. 

Back to December - Taylor Swift

I'm so glad you made time to see me

How's life, tell me how's your family?

I haven't seen them in a while

You've been good, busier then ever

We small talk, work and the weather

Your guard is up and I know why

Because the last time you saw me

Is still burned in the back of your mind

You gave me roses and I left them there to die

So this is me swallowing my pride

Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night

And I go back to December all the time

It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you

Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine

I'd go back to December, turn around and make it all right

I go back to December all the time

These days I haven't been sleeping

Staying up playing back myself leaving

When your birthday passed and I didn't call

And I think about summer, all the beautiful times

I watched you laughing from the passenger side

And realized I'd loved you in the fall

And then the cold came, the dark days when fear crept into my mind

You gave me all your love and all I gave you was goodbye

So this is me swallowing my pride

Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night

And I go back to December all the time

It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you

Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine

I'd go back to December turn around and change my own mind

I go back to December all the time

I miss your tan skin, your sweet smile, so good to me, so right

And how you held me in your arms that September night

The first time you ever saw me cry

Maybe this is wishful thinking

Probably mindless dreaming

But if we loved again I swear I'd love you right

I'd go back in time and change it but I can't

So if the chain is on your door, I understand

But this is me swallowing my pride

Standing in front of you saying I'm sorry for that night

And I go back to December

It turns out freedom ain't nothing but missing you

Wishing I'd realized what I had when you were mine

I'd go back to December turn around and make it all right

I'd go back to December turn around and change my own mind

I go back to December all the time all the time

November Rain - Guns N' Roses

When I look into your eyes
I can see a love restrained
But darlin' when I hold you
Don't you know I feel the same?

Nothin' lasts forever
And we both know hearts can change
And it's hard to hold a candle
In the cold November rain

We've been through this such a long long time
Just tryin' to kill the pain, ooh yeah
Love is always coming, love is always going
No one's really sure who's lettin' go today
Walking away

If we could take the time to lay it on the line
I could rest my head just knowin' that you were mine
All mine
So if you want to love me then darlin' don't refrain
Or I'll just end up walkin' in the cold November rain

Do you need some time on your own?
Do you need some time all alone?
Ooh, everybody needs some time on their own
Ooh, don't you know you need some time all alone

I know it's hard to keep an open heart
When even friends seem out to harm you
But if you could heal a broken heart
Wouldn't time be out to charm you?
Oh, oh, oh

Sometimes I need some time on my own
Sometimes I need some time all alone
Ooh, everybody needs some time on their own
Ooh, don't you know you need some time all alone

And when your fears subside
And shadows still remain, oh yeah
I know that you can love me when there's no one left to blame
So never mind the darkness, we still can find a way
'Cause nothin' lasts forever, even cold November rain

Don't ya think that you need somebody?
Don't ya think that you need someone?
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

Don't ya think that you need somebody?
Don't ya think that you need someone?
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

Don't ya think that you need somebody?
Don't ya think that you need someone?
Everybody needs somebody
You're not the only one
You're not the only one

Don't ya think that you need somebody?
Don't ya think that you need someone?
Everybody needs somebody

Nottinghill Dreams

(Verse 1)

Time and again I ask myself
What would I want? 
A good friend or a lover
Why does the drama in my head still linger on?  

People tell me that friendships last while crushes fade away 

*Chorus*

And it's not that I don't wanna believe 

But those Nottinghill dreams 
Just won't seem to go away
It's not that I don't wanna believe

That feelings would fade coz' time simply won't stand still

(Verse 2)

I wake up in the morning thinking of you
I go to bed at night wondering how I got myself into this
Wished you called to ask how I am
And at the same time I don't wanna hear your voice again
People tell me that friendships last while crushes fade away 

*Chorus*

And it's not that I don't wanna believe 

But those Nottinghill dreams 
Just won't seem to go away
It's not that I don't wanna believe

That feelings would fade coz' time simply won't stand still

(Bridge)

Say goodbye to fragmented daydreams

Reminiscing has no gains

Playing "Foolish Games" on the piano

Helps you to work through your pain

*Chorus*

And it's not that I don't wanna believe 

But those Nottinghill dreams  
Just won't seem to go away
It's not that I don't wanna believe

That feelings would fade coz' time simply won't stand still

Time simply won't stand still

Note: I started writing this song more than 20 years ago, but it was always left half complete, partly due to laziness, partly due to dissatisfaction with the lyrics in the earlier drafts. Finally finished it this past month, during this recent period of relatively new burst of creativity. 

Instrumental Compositions

I took up a songwriting lessons back in 2003/2004 purely out of interest. Some of my instructors were actually pretty famous in the local songwriting industry, one of them being the duo (作曲：劉國明/劉志文) that wrote the tune for 《一笑而过》sung by 那英.  

During that period of time I composed quite a few original pieces, and wrote them down in an old notebook. Finally transferred all these sketches into recordings/videos, which is really helpful to myself in remembering what they should sound like. 

Here's a collection of five pieces (without lyrics):

1）主题曲

2）爱情合约

3）Winter Sonatina

4）爵士的感觉 

5）Road Trip

Actually, the arrangement for "Road Trip" was just completed earlier this week. When going through all the draft sketches, I managed to find a way to combine two different compositions suitably into one. The style for both felt similar, so. I can totally imagine driving along Highway 1 on the Pacific Coast with this piece playing on the car stereo. 

童年

当我伤心失落的时候

无法摆脱那沉默

就会想到童年的疑惑

是如何轻易地越过

就会想到你

你单纯的微笑

你与我的心照

就想到往事直不停的旋绕

在我脑海中

仿佛是固执的心肝

不肯放弃童年的回忆和

当年的友谊

当我伤心失落的时候

无法摆脱那沉默

就会想到童年的疑惑

是如何轻易地越过

- Written circa 1999

Note: This is obviously an incomplete song with just one verse, bridge and chorus. (It's still unclear to me which stanza should be the verse and which the chorus.) But anyhow, until I find the motivation to write Chinese lyrics again, I'll leave it as is.   

Paper Boats

Little boy in the garden

He is folding those pretty paper boats

He sets them on a lake

And he watches as they float away from him

*Chorus*

Just like you these paper boats

They drift so far away

Out on the horizon setting with

The sunset

Yeah and why, why oh why,

Can't you come back to me

To these ripples I created for you

Little boy in the garden

He takes a stick

And tries to pull those boats back

But they've wandered out of reach

So he just stands at the edge and stares

*Chorus*

Little boy in the garden

He loses interest and finds a new toy

Unlike him I can't turn back

I'd rather stand at the edge and stare

*Chorus*

All those ripples 

Were never meant to chase

Chase you away

Yeah and why, why oh why 

Can't you come back to me

To these ripples I created for you

Little boy in the garden

Wish I could be just, just like him

And walk far away

As far away as you've drifted from me

Little boy in the garden...

- written circa 1999 in the aftermath of a lost friendship